It’s been raining. I know, I live on the West Coast, also known as the Wet Coast: What the hell am I expecting from this season called winter? But it’s been grey and rainy all week, with a random slush-storm thrown in for kicks. Last weekend was nice, but then the week before that was drizzle and darkness as well. This morning as we drove to work, I said to Oats that I think I prefer snowy winters to rainy ones. “But then you’d not ever ride your bike, because there’d be snowbanks blocking the curb lanes,” She pointed out. “At least in this weather you’ve got the option of suiting up in rain gear and cycling.”
An option, I might add, that I have not been exercising for weeks now.
Taking a break from my task list at the office, I stared out the window at the downpour and the thick pillow of moss growing on the roof across the way. If I don’t get this position with the provincial electrical utility, what will I do? Keep working here, I suppose, and make the job into something that really fits my skills and goals.
Most days, I’m okay with that. It’s not ideal, but it’s do-able, and could be satisfying.
Some days, though, such as those that involve never-ending rain, I remember being elsewhere and I think about the possibilities.
When I went to Australia, I was running away from so much, and it didn’t exactly get better once I was on the other side of the world. With that in mind, please understand that I know a change of scene isn’t a cure-all.
And yet it sure as hell feels good, to imagine a place I’ve never been.
For a romantic dreamer such as myself, it also feels good to do a bit of research. So, now I know: I’m eligible for a New Zealand work visa for the next 6 years. And their dollar is at three-quarters of ours. Huh. Suddenly I find myself looking at the view from the webcams of NZ’s Antarctica division, and checking for employment opportunities with their facilities (there are none).
In reality, I love my partner and my animals and my home and my community too much to leave it all for a chance at adventure anytime soon. My plans for the immediate future involve things like having kids and getting a good enough career that Oats can focus on art full-time, not learning to get by in foreign countries and building new social networks.
Having said that, this rain is really getting to me and so is this job. Pretending that I’ve got other places to be seems like a better coping mechanism than all the other self-destructive things I could be doing, so I’m going to keep it up.